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L O V E

hover around the letters above

ARE YOU STILL USING EXPLORER?
GIVE UP ON THAT
CATCH UP WITH THE TREND YOU LOSER
USE MOZILLA FIREFOX
BEST IN SINGAPORE, DUBAI & some say SRI LANKA

THIS BABY IS EXCELLENT WHEN VIEWED IN MOZILLA FIREFOX
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED (:

Tried to write a letter; In Love
I've got a piece of paper; But it's Empty

Fuck My Screwed Up Life

welcome back babiess!
i know i've neglecting this space of mine but i've been extremely busy.
i'm so not coping well enough with my studies so far.
TWO biology modules are just too much for me.
tu la. gatal kan nk amek course bio. rase ah kau. (see, who told you to apply for bio course? serve you right.)

putting that aside, i just came back from NP MCC FOC.
just as you all know, i joined Malay Cultural Club under Adiratna(Dikir).
been training my voice and claps. omg it's hard sia. but who knows, by next year, i can sing well. :D
the camp was FUNFUNFUN! but at the same time, quite boring.
could have been better la. nvm. kudos to them who worked hard for it. MCC loves~
INTAN RAWKS LA SEY!

oh ya. i fell in love, i think. i don't think it's love yet. but somewhere there. major crush.
sadly, we haven't talked yet. let me tell you about him.
i met him in MCC FOC. different group. he looks almost exactly like afiq.
& guess what? his name is afiq too. hahaha.
his attractive factor is that although he looks like afiq, he looks more like Ashri aka Dani from Danielle.
tu yg buat aku cair beb. (that's what makes me melt)

there are ALOT of couples in MCC. & i find them sweet & cute. whichever suits best.
but at the same time, i keep having flashbacks. i hate that.
i don't hate the memories. it's just that when it comes, my mood totally change.
& nothing can change it back. i seriously don't know why i'm feeling this way.
i told myself to move on. & i did. but now, i stopped moving on. i'm just stopping there.
am i waiting? maybe, i am. why am i feeling this way? are you feeling the same way too?
maybe i'm still hoping for a miracle. as i type, i have the urge to just send a sms to you.
saying: i miss you bby! but i know that'll make you uncomfortable.
this happens all the time. i'm just tired of waiting for your replies. i want to give up.
cause that might be the solution to this matter. but my heart just won't let me.
i hate my life for being so screwed up.
i hate you for entering my life and made such a difference.
i hate myself for letting you in and loving you with my all.
i just hate everything right now.
cause there's no one to wipe my tears as i'm typing now.
i'm trying my very best to prevent tears from falling.
don't think you can happily settle down and move on. you promised a reply to my email. which was due 6 months ago.
i'm just so disturbed by the fact that one moment, you're so friendly and sweet but the next moment, you ignore me like i don't even exist.
right now, i'm struggling to control myself from contacting you. but i know it won't make any difference to you. cause you don't even feel a loss without me.
get out of my life if you don't want to stay. but at least give me a confirmation.
i'm trying my damn best to move on but i just stop halfway.
something which i can't explain myself. and it's your fault. fuck you, love, with love.

i loved you, i still do.
i miss you like nobody's business.
i wish you do too but,
how could you be so damn heartless?

shoo fly, don't bother me.
i really hope you read this.

it ended: 0211.
26 May 2009.
till next time.
mucho loves.
iifaa